I told my kids that our very old, sweet dog was blind and would hurt himself if he bumped into their toys laying around the house. It was a credible lie because the dog really didn’t see very well.
Bobbi Berger, Hainesport

When children lie to their parents, a red dot appears on their forehead. Only adults can see the red dot, and the red dot always appears!
Jodi Levine, Cherry Hill

We aren’t French so you can’t eat French fries at fast food restaurants.
Jenny O’Grady, Monroe Township

Our elementary-age boys asked what the “F word” meant. They must have heard it from older kids. On the fly, I explained that it stood for “fang foot.”
Miriam Stern, Cherry Hill

Instead of “then they lived happily ever after,” I read: “Then they went to college, got a job, and they got married and lived happily ever after.”
Lori Christa, Mullica Hill

You would get spots like a rotting banana if you didn’t go outside. Got them off Xbox.
Karen Slattery, Haddonfield

Mister Softee was just a music truck that drove around playing tunes to let you know it was time for bed.
Jennifer Kemp-Kahoun, Haddon Heights

I had both boys convinced that the veggies in chicken noodle soup were called soup pieces so they’d eat them, no questions asked. It still works.
Sue Fenick, Marlton

In response to the “Where do babies come from” question, I said that when 2 people love each other very much, they make a baby. My son quickly replied, “I love you very much, Mommy. Can we make a baby?”
Debbie Dombrowski, Cherry Hill

When you eat carrots, you must have a crunch contest to see who can make the loudest sounds. And there has to be several rounds to really make it fair for all.
Cheryl Alkon, Berlin

If kids drink coffee, they will grow hair on their toes.
Sherry Scott, Glassboro

Our house isn’t haunted because ghosts are too expensive and we couldn’t afford their upkeep.
Rachel Miller, Bellmawr

We couldn’t get a sundae during the week because they were only sold on Sundays.
Jess Misler, Franklinville

I told my son that if he didn’t sit still at the table for meals, the food would go directly to his feet. When he challenged me, I told him it’s the reason he outgrows shoes. I won that battle.
Lisa Best, Riverside