“Lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, cheese, turkey and some honey mustard on the side.”
Brandon proudly declared his order on our way to Wawa, a far cry from what we have dealt with for years. In fact, I dedicated a whole column to our challenges with food – the headline was “Negotiating Over Nuggets.” But lately something has clicked. The boys are suddenly ready to try lots of different foods.
When we got to Wawa, they both made selections on the screens and then went to get cookies. For over a year we’d been trying to get the boys more involved in their food. So, I thought it might get them into the idea of eating a hoagie if they helped order. I let them choose their ingredients at the kiosk and when it was ready, we made our way back home. We sat down to eat and Brandon excitedly declared, “This is delicious!” Three small words, but another huge success. And a big relief, because food has been a major stressor.
I was worried the boys would be picky eaters like I was. I didn’t want the way we were approaching food to make it more difficult to get them to try things. Growing up, my parents said we had to eat everything that was on our plate. As a result, when we went out, I only ordered like three things to put on my plate – and those were things I knew I liked. This way I could clean my plate and not eat anything I didn’t like. I didn’t want to repeat this with the boys.
So now I’ve gone from writing about counting how few nuggets the boys have eaten to seeing the boys order custom sandwiches the way they want them prepared. I used to imagine having the freedom to go anywhere as a family and enjoy lots of options for eating, but it was hard to see that ever happening. The sudden change in the boys’ eating habits has been almost as liberating as not needing to change diapers.
Whether trying Chinese, tacos or BBQ, we haven’t ordered any special foods for the kids. We’ve sat around the table together, adults and children, chatting and laughing and eating. It makes me realize how much the kids are growing up. I’m also aware of how much I used to worry that things wouldn’t change, but they have.
Now 8, Brandon is much more willing to try a bite of just about anything. It might not be his favorite, but he’s starting to realize there’s more than the safe foods he’s always known. He’s coming home from school after purchasing school lunches he enjoyed. And he’s asking to try various cuisines more and more.
I’m so proud of how the boys have come to their own realization that it’s ok to give different foods a go. We’ve told them they’re welcome to try anything they’d like. And it’s ok if it’s not their favorite, so long as they give it a fair shake (or more than just one tiny taste).
The new-found confidence in food tasting from the boys reminds me again how fast it all goes. It was such a struggle that felt unending for so long. But here we are, able to grab food on the go and get more creative with our choices. A day we wondered about for a long time like it was a fantasy has arrived. I guess, despite our fears, Brandon won’t be going to college eating just pizza and chicken nuggets.