Wide Awake: Think Less
And other things I’ve learned from my husband
By Marianne Aleardi

There are times when I’m talking to my husband Joe that I’ll bring up something I’ve been mulling over in my head, analyzing, maybe even worrying about. It’s often likely that I’ve been thinking about this for days, which he’ll know because it won’t be the first time I mentioned it to him. Very often he’ll say, in amazement, “Why are you still thinking about that?”

And I’ll respond, “How are you not still thinking about that?”

It’s happened enough recently that I’ve realized that between the 2 of us, the one who thinks less is much better off. It’s something he’s been trying to tell me for years. But I finally understand. This isn’t the first time I learned something from Joe. Not at all. So I wanted to write down some things he’s said that, I have to admit, are pretty smart.

Don’t worry about things you can’t control. Goes along with that think less concept, but it is very, very good advice.

Never touch a flight attendant. He said this after I witnessed a man grab a flight attendant’s wrist during a flight, which brought the Philly police onboard when we landed.

Philadelphia sports teams can break your heart. But there’s always next year.

You should close out phone apps as soon as you’re done using them. I don’t do this. So I’m always asking, “Why is my phone so slow?”

NYC can be magical. We’ve proven this many times.

The house doesn’t have to look 100% perfect when people are coming over.

It’s ok if I don’t want to eat dinner.

It is absolutely fine to have nothing planned for the weekend. And then to actually do nothing on the weekend. I have a really hard time with this.

Vacation with little kids is just life somewhere else. I have him realizing – and saying – this on video. We are in Disney World and our oldest daughter Klein is 7 months old. So we were 7 months in to having a child for the first time ever, and we went to Disney. It was by no means a vacation – it was just life as new parents, in another state.

Before you make a Cosmo, put a martini glass in the freezer for about 10 minutes.

You can be married to someone for 35 years and still want to spend time with them more than anyone else.

It’s all about expectations. Everyone in our family repeats this truth often, but Joe started it all.

Don’t run from something, run to something. This has been said the few times one of the girls has talked about making a major change, like switching jobs.

Steak and wine make for a great meal.

You can never watch a Rocky movie too many times. Unless it’s Rocky V.

Don’t put a really good knife in the dishwasher, no matter what the manufacturer says.

When it’s hot, it’s important to hydrate – but not with alcohol.

When you board a plane, take out everything you will need for the flight, then put your bag in the overhead and sit down. Every move you make – make it quickly.

Always leave a very good tip. (And this didn’t start during the pandemic.)

Two hard-boiled eggs and 7 almonds can be a snack. No way. If you even have to count, it’s not a snack.

Go food shopping early on Sunday mornings.

Laugh as much as you can.

About 10 years ago, I wrote a column similar to this one, only the list was lessons I learned from my dad. I’m going to end this column the same way I ended that one.

No matter what, he loves me.

September 2022
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